Toughest Blog Ever

How do I write this post?

Today I want to write about a friend who is very private and shy. I've mentioned her before on my blog, but only in passing. She knows this particular post is inevitable and has given me direction; nothing sappy or sucky. Period. So.... I'm trying to figure out how to respect her wishes while conveying what her friendship means to me. (Geez... that sentence probably already crossed a line into her 'sucky-free' zone).

I've mentioned before that my two closest friends are both named 'Barb'. They couldn't be more different. As we all know, Barb Yule LOVES to have her name in neon lights on my blog. Barb Vincent (Barbent)? Cringes at the thought.

I met Barbent when she first moved to town. We were at meeting and she was asking about the local services and wanted to know if there was a library. Library, you say? My ears perked up immediately and we started talking about books. Off we went and we didn't stop until another person at the table suggested we might want to go for coffee so that the meeting could get back on track. So, we did and the rest is history.

I don't know how to describe Barb. She's shy and bold. Quiet and hilarious. Soft and strong. A walking contradiction. We are ridiculously alike. During the past two years she has been an incredible source of support for me as my marriage imploded. She never once told me what she thought I should do; however she did say "Something has to happen. You can't just keep spinning your wheels." She was right.

She makes me laugh (til we both snort). She calls me on my shit. She asks the hard questions. She makes me watch 'The Bachelor'. She stalks me when I'm overwhelmed and I withdraw into my cocoon, ignoring the phone and the world around me (which is my modus operandi). She's an amazing friend and we don't get too many of those in this life.

She's moving to Regina. Today. We went for dinner last night, the two of us with her wonderful, patient partner, Norm. LDR and Tim joined us too and we had a great time. Tons of laughter and great conversation. I tried to pretend it was just dinner, not the last dinner. Today I went up to the barn where she and Norm were loading the horses into the trailer before leaving. I almost missed them and we stopped on the side of the road to say goodbye. Impossible to pretend this time. I will miss her more than I can tell you and Nakusp feels like such a very lonely place today.


(Not too sucky, right? How did I do??)

Done!

Just to be clear;
#1 Packrat - Priscilla
#2 Packrat - Percy

How do I know this? Because I caught Percy and he was MUCH bigger (and stinkier... sorry fellas) than the first one. He was far less agreeable to the whole 'getting caught' process as well.

I'd like to believe that I'm done with trapping critters. Some friends laugh when I say this. They believe that there is an entire family (with in-laws and cousins) living here or at least nearby. I set the trap again last night, just in case. No packrat this morning.

I'll be sure to keep you posted.
*sigh*

A Conversation

So, Suze... it's Friday night! What are you up to?

Well, dear Internet, I'm setting a trap for a Packrat.

Good heavens, Suze. Why would you do such a thing? You already caught Percy!

Why yes. Yes I did already catch Percy. You're absolutely correct.

Then why on earth would you set the trap again? Is this a new hobby for you?

Oh, no!! *chuckle, chuckle, chuckle* Silly, Internet. It's not a new hobby for me. I'm setting the Packrat trap yet again BECAUSE I HAVE ANOTHER FUCKING PACKRAT LIVING WITH ME. How do I know this? Because I found a previously unopened package of crackers on the floor of my laundry room with a big FUCKING chewy-hole chewed in it. Not a delicate little mouse chewy-hole, a big Packrat chewy hole. Remember our "Is it a Percy or Priscilla Packrat" debate? Yeah, try Percy AND Priscilla.

Oh. Oh, dear.

Yeah. "Oh, dear indeed."
********

I was clearly in denial.

My friend Barb (Barbent, not Mybarb) said "Susan, I think you might have another packrat..."
To which I replied, "No. No, I don't. I only had one and it's gone."

My son Connor said, "Ma... the packrat you caught isn't the same colour as the one we saw the other night...."
To which I replied, "You must be mistaken, Connor. Perhaps it was the light."

Wish me luck. Mybarb is dying to have a critter of her own and has asked me to relocate the packrat to her house. I plan to happily oblige her. Karma, Baby!

Percy is Pissed!

Seriously people!!!

Look at his cute eyes. His cute little fingers. His bushy little tail!

Everyone; meet Percy.

(I can't get used to Priscilla. Just can't do it.)

Since I had no success for 2 nights in a row with the trap, I decided to do a little googling. The general consensus seemed to be that peanut butter was the best lure, so I put some on a cracker, tucked it into the cage and set the trap. I turned the lights off, came into my bedroom and was sitting on the edge of my bed, setting my alarm clock for the morning when I heard 'wham'! I assumed that I simply hadn't set the trap correctly and went to reset it.

The second I entered the kitchen, Percy went bananas.

B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

It was like the cage itself was alive. I grabbed my camera (thinking of y'all and the photos I promised) and laid down on my stomach on the floor. I started talking to him and he settled right down. I guess he's used to my voice. He was very curious about the camera and the noises that it was making but went about his business, eating peanut butter and trying to plot his escape.

At the moment, Percy is in his cage in the garage. Driving up a logging road in the dark at 11:00pm on a Sunday night didn't seem like the smartest choice so he'll stay there until I finish work tomorrow and I'll do the release then.

I know I sound very calm and brave at the moment, but of course after I discovered him, I immediately called my friend-who-doesn't-want-to-be-named-in-my-blog (still rhymes with 'Barb Vincent') and left her a hysterical voicemail message. I have no doubt that she will laugh hysterically when she listens to it. I bet Percy would LOVE to move in with Barb.... she has a nice horse trailer that would be perfect for him.

So. Percy 3, Suze 1. I'm not confident enough to claim victory just yet.... little Houdini could still suprise me when I open the garage door tomorrow.

To be continued....

*sigh*

0945 hrs.

Trap door triggered shut, no packrat in it.

Percy-Priscilla 3 Suze 0

0418 Hrs

Almost asleep... just on the verge when I hear 'THUNK'.
My bleary mind thinks "Oh, must be Percy."
Suddenly my eyes are wide open, remembering the 'live trap'.
Then I groan, remembering the Priscilla potential.

I head for the kitchen, turning lights on as I go.
There on the kitchen counter is the trap with the door closed.
There beside the cage (no, not inside) is Priscilla-Percy.

Priscilla-Percy 2 Suze 0

Oh. My. God.

So, Connor requires a ride home from Fauquier at around 12:30am. No Percy sightings yet and I'm surprised; I usually see him buy this time of night. Off to Fauquier to pick up Connor, home at 2:00am. I come into the house, certain that Percy will have been captured, but alas, the cage is empty.

I haven't seen Connor in over a week, so we sit on the sofa to talk and catch up. I hear a noise. Outside. Huh? The windows are open and who shows up, climbing the screens? Percy. Outside the house.

Connor goes to open the patio door and I holler at him to stop. Don't let Percy in!!! But Ma, how will you catch him in the cage if he's outside? WTF?? I'm going to let a packrat INTO my house so that I can catch him in a cage? I decide to leave Percy outside when he climbs onto the screen again.

Connor watches Percy then says "Uh... Ma?".
Oh, God. I see it too. Mother of God, I see it too.

Percy has nipples. Big nipples. Percy is Priscilla.
And Priscilla is either about 7 minutes from giving birth or has a litter of critters somewhere.
(I refuse to say it. Don't make me say it.)
No wonder Priscilla is going bananas at my window screen trying to get INTO the house.

0348hrs.
Priscilla 1 Suze 0